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Psych wk 2: Day 8
went in LATE. missed morning rounds. i slunk in like the loser that i was. felt like a criminal, hoping that no one noticed, although i'm SURE they had, since there are only 3 med students in our unit. plus, i loaned my 2 umbrellas to the chief resident, and he was supposed to return em to me, so he was DEFINITELY going to look for me.
yep. my attending noticed. "jacob. (awkward, unnatural, stretched smile) we missed you today."
"um, yeah...i didn't hear my alarm clock go off this morning (true)."
"sleep is good, isn't it? (same, unnatural, false smile)"
i'm floundering, because i can't tell if he's being nice, with a slightly unnatural smile to put me at ease, or if he's being slightly sarcastic, and letting me know in a gentle way, that this is not going to ever be tolerated again.
"yes, it is." (what else am i supposed to say?)
so, i did my work like a madman, and tried to be super-diligent.
*****
the more time i spend with one of my patients, the more i'm convinced that she is not psychotic or paranoid. she sounds it at first, but the more i chat with her, the more i'm convinced that she's telling the truth. she IS a little manic, for which she needs meds. and after taking them, she's fine. there's no need for her to be in a psych unit, nor for her children to be taken away, etc. i don't know if it is just me, that i'm identifying with my pt too much, or if this is a true observation...
yesterday, during my psychoanalytic theory session and interview, we talked about a patient that we all saw together. i was struck by how cold and callous some of the ppl in my group were. they were so nice, so understanding, smiling and bobbing their heads during the interview, and when we're in a diff room w/o the pt, they just assume all the worst things about the pt. they're not very big on giving ppl the benefit of the doubt. they see a person that fits a typical profile, and then assume that they know a whole bunch of stuff about him. i wasn't too happy with my group members.
yakob at 8:01 PM
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went in LATE. missed morning rounds. i slunk in like the loser that i was. felt like a criminal, hoping that no one noticed, although i'm SURE they had, since there are only 3 med students in our unit. plus, i loaned my 2 umbrellas to the chief resident, and he was supposed to return em to me, so he was DEFINITELY going to look for me.
yep. my attending noticed. "jacob. (awkward, unnatural, stretched smile) we missed you today."
"um, yeah...i didn't hear my alarm clock go off this morning (true)."
"sleep is good, isn't it? (same, unnatural, false smile)"
i'm floundering, because i can't tell if he's being nice, with a slightly unnatural smile to put me at ease, or if he's being slightly sarcastic, and letting me know in a gentle way, that this is not going to ever be tolerated again.
"yes, it is." (what else am i supposed to say?)
so, i did my work like a madman, and tried to be super-diligent.
*****
the more time i spend with one of my patients, the more i'm convinced that she is not psychotic or paranoid. she sounds it at first, but the more i chat with her, the more i'm convinced that she's telling the truth. she IS a little manic, for which she needs meds. and after taking them, she's fine. there's no need for her to be in a psych unit, nor for her children to be taken away, etc. i don't know if it is just me, that i'm identifying with my pt too much, or if this is a true observation...
yesterday, during my psychoanalytic theory session and interview, we talked about a patient that we all saw together. i was struck by how cold and callous some of the ppl in my group were. they were so nice, so understanding, smiling and bobbing their heads during the interview, and when we're in a diff room w/o the pt, they just assume all the worst things about the pt. they're not very big on giving ppl the benefit of the doubt. they see a person that fits a typical profile, and then assume that they know a whole bunch of stuff about him. i wasn't too happy with my group members.
yakob at 8:01 PM