Thursday, May 2

Today, I will be tested on taking a medical history and doing a full physical. It's rather intimidating, because there are many parts to both the history and especially the physical. Not only will they check to see if I do everything, they will also check to see how smooth I am (believe it or not, this is very important, to give the patient confidence about their doctor). The history is going to be a bit of a problem, as I tend to get really interested in their stories and ask them lots of questions, few that are related to their illness. There are just a lot of interesting people with interesting stories, you know? After getting a general idea, i really need to start directing the conversation. It's going to be tough remembering all the parts to the physical... and then I have to present the patient to the doctor, which I've never really done formally before. So, my knees are going to be knocking together as I do this.

An hour and a half to do the history, physical, present the patient to the doctor, and then get rocked by the doctor. GREAT. This is just the best way to relax before my exam on Monday. They really know how to throw an extra wrench in there while you are getting stressed out. Meanwhile, I'm supposed to be studying for the boards, but how can I do that when I have to prepare for this AND the exam on Monday? This place is killing me. I laugh to think back to last year, when I actually contemplated taking an art class or a public health class in addition to my med school work. HAHA. There is no way. I hardly even have time to sketch anymore, except in class, when I can't stand listening to a professor who doesn't speak English (mostly pathologists). Then, I draw my hands, the back of people's heads, the professors, anything. I don't want to be stuck at a plateau. I need to keep pushing myself, to be bolder with my strokes, with my shading, to forget what I think should be, and draw what is. If anything, this struggle I have with this particular issue speaks much of my pride. I think I know what shade on something looks like, but when I REALLY observe, that's when I see that it's completely different, that I don't know much of anything. It's a craft that humbles you, drawing.

For those of you who have ANY inkling to draw, I would like to recommend a book called, My Name Is Asher Lev. It is about a Hasidic Jew (for those of you who don't know, as I didn't know, especially since I've never seen or heard of these people until I came to NY, these Jews are very orthodox Jews, the ones you sometimes see wearing black high hats with black overcoats, with huge beards and the long curly sideburns), a child, who is born with an artistic genius. It turns out to be a problem, because the Hasidic Jews don't really think art is important, especially not more important that the Talmud. The book is about his struggle, his growth, his battle external and within. It was first recommended to me by Charlotte R., and I have since read this, it's sequel, The Gift of Asher Lev, and other books by Chaim Potok: The Chosen, and The Promise. I promise you that you will LOVE these books. They are really fabulous, and I am personally of the conviction that Mr. Potok is a genius as well, to be able to write so.

yakob at 10:53 AM

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